Down on Dating? - Make It Fun Again

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As a woman whose had lots of dating experience, I know dating can be a lot of things—draining, a roller coaster of emotions, scary, a gamble, and it can actually be——FUN!

What’s that? Fun hasn’t been your experience lately?

Well then, allow me to share with you three tips I’ve picked up along the way that have made it more enjoyable for me. (and I’ll be sharing 3 more on a Facebook Live this Friday at 12:30pm, come chime in and ask questions!)

We can’t change anything about our date, but here’s a few things you can do to create more fun in the dating process.

  1. Honor Your Gut - Dating and especially online dating can be a major sorting process. You may be reading hundreds of profiles and trying to filter down which ones catch your eye and match your values and interests. When deciding who you’re going to go on a date with, be sure to listen to your gut. You know when that sense of curiosity and intrigue kicks in—go with that! It’s tempting to agree to the tall and wealthy handsome guy without tuning inward to ask yourself if who he is catches your attention.

Following your inner intuition and intrigue about a person is an amazing guide towards choosing a date who you’ll enjoy more and are more likely to create a good connection with. It sounds obvious, but you’ll be surprised how often we women can give little credit to one of our best assets by choosing a man who checks all the boxes instead of honoring our intuition.

2. Be a “Yes Woman” - As we age it’s a natural tendency to be more pragmatic about what we will and won’t do. “I don’t go on boat rides.” “I don’t stay out after 10pm.” “I don’t go on muddy hikes.” But I want to invite you to lean into your “Yes woman” side. Just like being a girl again whose neighbor friend comes and asks if you want to skateboard down a big hill, as kids we just said “Yes!” We didn’t ask how high it was or what the wheels were like or where we would end up. We went with the flow in the moment and trusted things would be fun. Say yes more on your dates and you may be surprised!

3. Change Your State Before the Date - When getting ready for your dates, I’ve found it makes a big difference on how you go into the date. You may be coming home from a long day at work, tired or have jittery nerves from a stressful day. If you want to bring playful energy into the date, it can be helpful to shift into a more relaxed, higher energy or silly state. What state do you want to be in to show up as your best self?

Maybe you come alive doing a comedy act in the mirror as you get ready. Maybe you need to calm down your nervous system, so you first relax into a bath to feel grounded. Maybe you need to put on your favorite song and dance around. If you can change your state you will show up on the date more ready to engage and bring fun energy.

Have you experienced these or more ideas? I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments. Or show up tomorrow on FB live at 12:30pm. I hope to see you there!